clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
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