Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so let's talk penis.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize