I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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