She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I wish you could order shots online.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
