why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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