What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
