That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
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Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
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I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude