Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
