Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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