I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
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I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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