was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
