Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
whose ass print is on the piano?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize