I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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