You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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