Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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