VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
