just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
