Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize