Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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