Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
