in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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