I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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