I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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