You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
