I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize