that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
