So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
