: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize
