I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize