I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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