He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Randomize
