Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize