How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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