i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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