i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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