If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
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