yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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