You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
