Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
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