You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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