So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!