I never want to see another naked old woman again.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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