I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize