singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
