ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He felt like a one man threesome
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
