I wanna passion pit in your ass
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize