the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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