I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
