it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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