I wannas sexs uuuuu
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
